Saturday, November 20, 2010

Never Doubt in the Darkness

"Never doubt in the darkness what you believed in the light." (Joni E. Tada)

A very good friend sent me this quote today and oh did I need it! Lately I've heard myself say some things I never would have EVER thought would come out of my mouth.

No, I'm not cussing like a sailor-that would be mild compared to what I've said. Here I am bumbling about in a darkness created by someone I love very much and everything I've ever taught is heckling me in the shadows.

How can God be good when He doesn't answer your cries?
Maybe He doesn't really hear you!
Maybe He doesn't even care.
Maybe His are IS too short to save and His ear IS too dull to hear!
Maybe you don't know how to hear Him at all!

I'm afraid I'm guilty of doubting in the darkness what I believed in the light. I know God is good. I know He loves me. I know He will answer my prayers for His very own glory (which includes my very own good).

But...the mean time is MEAN! And there are still 24 hours in a day. And when all that surrounds me points to the exact opposite of all that I am praying...

I guess that's what makes the darkness dark. So, let me see if I can recall what I believed in the light. Here is an excerpt from chapter 2 in my upcoming book "Spiritual Warfare for Women"

Every attack from the Enemy brings with it a divine invitation from the sovereign hand of God to learn by experience what love does.

If I did not believe that truth I wouldn’t be writing this book. I told you in the introduction that since I started writing I have been diagnosed with cancer, our church was flooded and my daughter left home. I’ve no doubt that what I have experienced is more than what some of you have experienced in the past few months and less than what others of you have experienced recently. As I reference my personal battles please know that in no way am I diminishing the battles you face. I am humble as I share with you that already I have experienced the love of God in each of these situations. Two of them (the cancer and flood) have impressively demonstrated the power and glory of God. And I am fully convinced that He will do the same, perhaps even bigger and better in my daughter’s life as well. Furthermore, I am convinced that God will also demonstrate His power and His glory in whatever circumstances you find yourself in today.

Every attack from the Enemy, every one brings with it a divine invitation to experience what God’s love does. Romans 8:28 speaks to this truth:

Romans 8:28 (HCSB)
28 We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.

"Never doubt in the darkness what you believed in the light."


Miranda said...

So very true! Thank you for sharing your heart. Your transparency in your darkness will help more people than a hundred books they can read. Love you dearly!

Anonymous said...

I am right there with you Sister! I have poured it all out to God, dished it out is more like it.

I am so frustrated with what seems to be total SILENCE from Him, when I am crying out for mercy from Him. Saying, "God, our family can't take anymore!" And yet the next day is worse than the one before.

I think when one of our children is hurting--is there anything worse for a mother?

I honestly believe our family is under spiritual attack. It is coming from so many directions, and sometimes I just don't think we can get through. There is just TOO MUCH and yet it keeps coming.

I don't understand at all, but I will share with you that I've been reading 1 Peter over and over again. If you haven't been there lately, I highly recommend it.

I guess the key is this: He will do it as He decides, which may not line up with our hopes and dreams.

And you know the Enemy wants nothing more than for us to DOUBT our God.

I recently wrote this on our blog:
I *thought* I knew what we could handle. I was obviuosly wrong. Moment by moment is our daily motto these days. And we never know what those moments will hold. And we have a choice: TRUST God or turn from Him. And when life is so tough and challenging and heartbreaking, we have a choice: blame Him or praise Him. And when we have no answer and healing seems impossible, we have a choice: give up because God won’t answer or keep knocking, keep seeing, and keep asking because He is able.

Hope you all have a blessed Thanksgiving with your family, Leslie