Monday, March 15, 2010

God is moving mountains

One tendency I have on here is to be a bit too open with what really goes on in the lives of my children. Somehow they ALWAYS hear about what I say and I have to "cover" by assuring them that "no, I did not talk too personally about you." So, let me see if I can share with you how God is moving mountains without sharing too personally for the sake of my children.

If you are a mother you know what it is like to be "consummed" with prayers for your children. You know what it is like to hurt deeply when they hurt, to feel their dreams as if they were your own, and to wish to goodness that you knew then what you know now--also wishing that they would realize how much they need YOU to tell them what you know now!!

Well, I've had two specific mountain size prayers for two of my children. One has been prayed fervently for almost a year and the other has been prayed fervently for 4 years. Both these prayers depended on major break-throughs by God. I had done what I could do, and only God could impact the answers to my prayers. I have to confess that at times I was more disciplined in my fervency even adding fasting to some of my prayers. But right now I have not even had the energy to keep up with them. In fact, the moment I heard "you have cancer" God told me to let go of one of my children. He clearly said that He would take care of her/him and that I didn't have to. I was incredibly impressed with how much faith each of them has demonstrated in the past two weeks since we got our news.

And since March 1 when I was diagnosed with cancer both my fervent, mountain size prayers have been answered! I mean mountain-moving answers!! I so wish I could give you the exact details...but, I can't. Just suffice it to say that when I say God is moving mountains...they are Colorado kind of mountains, not the middle TN foothills.

I had a PET Scan today in an old building off Murphy Avenue. It was a sentimental journey. For 20 years ago I went to Murphy Ave each month for infertility treatment. As I sat still waiting on the radioactive glucose to make its way through my body I was reminded of the day I also sat still after artificial insemination. I thought about how different this journey is from that one. Instead of asking for new life to come into my body, I am hoping to protect and preserve the only life I have.

And I couldn't help but reflect on how faithful God has been to me through the years. He let my body conceive and birth life not once but 3 times and even now He's still watching over and intersecting those lives in ways that I can't. Surely the God who holds the world together can take care of cancer in me--and move mountains for my children.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

This is SO encouraging, Leighann and really has ministered to me. I can certainly relate to your infertility journey and also to the "Momma" journey. Bless you today! Love you! Lisa C.